Where does custom of walking back 3 steps in the beginning of shemoneh esrei and waving your hand to people to left and the right come from

The custom of taking three steps forward before the Amidah comes from early rabbinic and halachic tradition, rooted in the idea of approaching a king with deliberate, respectful movement. The practice of taking three steps back and bowing left and right, however, belongs to the end of the Amidah (not the beginning), and has distinct sources of its own. Let me clarify both customs fully.

Key Takeaways

Three steps forward before the Amidah symbolize drawing near to the Divine Presence, like approaching a king — sourced in the Rokeach and codified in the Shulchan Arukh.
Three steps backward at the end of the Amidah (not the beginning) symbolize respectfully withdrawing from before a king.
The bowing left and right at the end derives from the conclusion of Oseh Shalom, taking leave of the Divine Presence like a servant departing from a master.
The Talmud and Shulchan Arukh ground both customs in the metaphor of standing before a royal court.
The "waving" or nodding to neighbors is a later folk custom — it is not the primary intent of the bowing, which is directed toward God.

Three Steps Forward — Before the Amidah

The Source

The Shulchan Arukh, Orach Chayim 95 cites the Rokeach (Rabbi Elazar of Worms, 12th–13th century):

וְיֵשׁ אוֹמְרִים כְּשֶׁעוֹמֵד לְהִתְפַּלֵּל יֵלֵךְ לְפָנָיו ג׳ פְּסִיעוֹת דֶּרֶךְ קֵירוּב וְהַגָּשָׁה לְדָבָר שֶׁצָּרִיךְ לַעֲשׂוֹת "And some say that when one stands to pray, he should walk forward three steps, as an act of drawing near and approaching what he needs to do."

[Shulchan Arukh, Orach Chayim 95:1, citing the Rokeach]

The idea is that prayer requires kavanah (intention and focus), and the three steps inward signal a conscious transition — you are now entering sacred space, approaching the Melech Malchei HaMelachim (King of Kings).

The Deeper Meaning

Peninei Halakhah (17:2) elaborates that these three steps mirror the structure of the Temple: one would pass through progressively more sacred zones before arriving in the Divine Presence. The steps are an embodied reenactment of that approach. [Peninei Halakhah, Prayer 17:2]

Three Steps Backward — After the Amidah

This Is Where the Bowing Left and Right Occurs

The far more prominent and universally practiced custom is the three steps backward taken at the very end of the Amidah, during Oseh Shalom. This is where the "waving" — actually a bowing motion — to the left and right takes place.

The Talmud Yerushalmi (Berakhot 1:1) and later authorities describe this as the manner in which a servant takes leave of his master — not turning his back abruptly, but withdrawing gradually and respectfully.

The Halachic Source

The Shulchan Arukh, Orach Chayim 123:1 rules that one takes three steps backward at the conclusion of the Amidah. The Mishnah Berurah explains:

The three steps symbolize exiting the King's chamber step by step.
One bows to the left first (which is the right side of the Shekhinah, the Divine Presence facing you), then to the right, then bows forward center.

This corresponds to the words of Oseh Shalom:

"Oseh Shalom bimromav" — bow to the left
"Hu ya'aseh shalom aleinu" — bow to the right
"V'al kol Yisrael" — bow forward/center

Why Left First?

Rashi and later the Mishnah Berurah explain that bowing to your left corresponds to God's right — and one always honors the more important side (God's right) first. [Mishnah Berurah 123:5]

What About the "Waving to People"?

The bowing motion to the left and right is not primarily directed at other congregants — it is directed toward the Shekhinah. However, because this movement visually resembles a greeting or acknowledgment of people nearby, a custom developed in some communities where people do nod or acknowledge their neighbors at this moment.

This is a folk extension of the practice, not its halachic foundation. The Aruch HaShulchan (OC 123) cautions that the focus should remain on the Shekhinah and the conclusion of prayer, not social interaction.

The Unifying Theme

Both customs — steps forward at the start and steps backward at the end — reflect the same core idea drawn from [Deuteronomy 10:17]:

כִּי יְהֹוָה אֱלֹהֵיכֶם הוּא אֱלֹהֵי הָאֱלֹהִים וַאֲדֹנֵי הָאֲדֹנִים "For the LORD your God is the God of gods and the Lord of lords."

We approach the Amidah as subjects entering a royal throne room — with ceremony, intentionality, and reverence — and we depart the same way.

For personal guidance on the precise practice in your community, consult your local rabbi or posek.